Today I went to an SAA meeting and got to hear a friend of mine presenting his “first step”. First step is a terminology used to describe the first step of Sex Addicts Anonymous which reads “We admitted we were powerless over addictive sexual behavior - that our lives had become unmanageable”. The first step tradition of SAA is to have the members write out their sexual history and examples of how progressively out of control their behaviors got. You can read more about the first step presentation here: http://www.sexaa.org/SAALiterature/English/FirstStepGuide/
This might sound a little rough, but it has a huge therapeutically benefit. First of all it forces the presenter to really take an honest look at his or her life, and realize just how much damage has been done.
Secondly, it is a very scary thing to do. Most of the sex addicts spend their lives believing that if somebody every found out about the nature of their behavior they would never talk to them again. So imagine how it would feel to sit down in front of 10-20 people and tell them everything, and I mean EVERYTHING that you’ve ever done. You know what happens next? People simply relate to you. Why? Because most of them had very similar experiences.
I remember my first step. It was one of the scariest things that I’ve ever done. At the same time it felt so good to finally get it all out. I felt like the weight was lifted of my shoulder. And the most surprising thing was that not only people did not stop to like me, it seemed that they started to like me more.
Listening to my friend today was a good remind of how sad and out of control my life used to be. It also was a good reminder of how much I love sobriety and the feeling of (relative) serenity and peace that it brings into my life.
It also reminded me how much I love FeedTheRightWolf.org. When I started this blog a little over 2 years ago, I couldn’t, in my wildest dreams, expect it to become such a great recovery spot on the internet as it has become. And I have nothing to do with it. It is all thanks to you and people like you who are participating in our common journey!
And our forum? I am so proud of our forum! I’ve been participating in many online forums over the years, but I have never came across such loving and carrying group of people before.
If you haven’t been following it, I highly suggest you pay it a visit. There is so much good stuff and love that flows through those pages, I couldn’t possibly express it all in here.
I wanted to give special thanks to Mr. and Mrs. Absolution, Mrs. Anon, Big Al, Dpacrepantance, RightWolf, SadMax, Sami, Nick123, Xenon and many others. You guys are the best! Thank you so much for all your love, care, and support!
May God Bless You All!
Alex
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