Hi, I've read your article and thought it was very helpful. I really need some advice as I think my partner of 9 years is addicted to pornography. I've always known he had a great interest in porn but its worried me more and more over the years...about 2 years ago he started to bring his sexual fantasies into the bedroom, which I went along with to make him happy, the requests got more and more explicit to the point its ruined my sex drive completely and I can barely bring myself to make love anymore. The other day I looked at the internet history on his phone and found that he veiws about 20 different hardcore porn sites a day at work ( I was shocked to say the least) I confronted him and he admitted he's got a big problem and he viewed them during fag breaks at work. We have 3 children together and the last thing I want is to end our relationship but I can't deal with this anymore, I've told him numerous times over the years that I don't like him watching it because it makes me feel insecure and self concious. Please please help me because I really don't know where to turn. :(
If your partner is interested in getting help, I think this site is a good place to start. If he is ready for more personal help, I would recommend counseling and any 12 step group dedicated to Sex Addiction (Sexaholics Anonymous, Sex Addicts Anonymous, or Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous). http://www.feedtherightwolf.org/2010/04/list-of-12-step-programs.html
As far as for help for you, I would also recommend a few resources for you.
Codependents Anonymous - for all people struggling with troubled relationships: http://www.coda.org/
Co Sex Addicts Anonymous: This group is OK, but my Significant Other(SO) had pretty bad experience with in person meetings, she liked the phone meetings though. http://www.cosa-recovery.org/
2 comments:
Hi, I've read your article and thought it was very helpful.
I really need some advice as I think my partner of 9 years is addicted to pornography.
I've always known he had a great interest in porn but its worried me more and more over the years...about 2 years ago he started to bring his sexual fantasies into the bedroom, which I went along with to make him happy, the requests got more and more explicit to the point its ruined my sex drive completely and I can barely bring myself to make love anymore. The other day I looked at the internet history on his phone and found that he veiws about 20 different hardcore porn sites a day at work ( I was shocked to say the least) I confronted him and he admitted he's got a big problem and he viewed them during fag breaks at work.
We have 3 children together and the last thing I want is to end our relationship but I can't deal with this anymore, I've told him numerous times over the years that I don't like him watching it because it makes me feel insecure and self concious.
Please please help me because I really don't know where to turn. :(
Kind regards
Hi Emma. I am sorry to hear about your struggle.
If your partner is interested in getting help, I think this site is a good place to start. If he is ready for more personal help, I would recommend counseling and any 12 step group dedicated to Sex Addiction (Sexaholics Anonymous, Sex Addicts Anonymous, or Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous). http://www.feedtherightwolf.org/2010/04/list-of-12-step-programs.html
As far as for help for you, I would also recommend a few resources for you.
Online Groups:
Daily Strength Sex Addiction Forum, there are a lot of spouses there, and they are very helpful.
http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Sex-Pornography-Addiction/support-group
Porn Addiction Forum, also has a spouse section and people are also very helpful:
http://pornaddictioninfo.com/boards/forumdisplay.php?fid=10
I would also recommend in-person meetings.
Codependents Anonymous - for all people struggling with troubled relationships:
http://www.coda.org/
Co Sex Addicts Anonymous: This group is OK, but my Significant Other(SO) had pretty bad experience with in person meetings, she liked the phone meetings though.
http://www.cosa-recovery.org/
Co Sex And Love Addicts Anonymous: http://www.coslaa.org/
Best of luck to you Emma, I am sorry you had to go through this!
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